001 / VIDEO / Rhy$.$trongfork

[smugreport]

[ Rhys is already an irritable guy, and of he isn't getting a good nights sleep and his basic creature comforts he's even quicker to be a snippy asshole. He must be at a breaking point or something, cause he's really Feeling It Mr. Krabs this week.

The video clicks on, camera focusing on Rhys's face, behind him the sleeping pods from the dorm that he hasn't been lucky enough to escape for the month. ]

So hey, I've been really, really patient with this whole situation. Waaaay more reasonable than anyone deserves, but I think it's about time I put this out there:

Lack of privacy? Of fresh air- real or simulated? Of access to the infirmary, gym, or spa if there even is one on this ship- It's an infringement on human rights.

That's right, I'm suing! And all of you should too. Who's with me?

Comments

Rhy$.$trongfork

[smugreport]

Clear pores and relaxed muscles are a human right.

[counterstep]

Huh. Guess I've been violating my own human rights by not doing anything about either of those.

( talk about a pampered lifestyle that someone would think these things though. )

Doesn't steam do the trick for pores? There'd be plenty of that if you run all the showers on hot. Maybe you could do a sauna night or something.

[smugreport]

Voluntarily denying yourself the right to a smooth complexion is your business, gatekeeping is the issue here.

That's....not the same. It's a whole package deal. You can't throw a couple petals into a bath and call it luxury.

[counterstep]

If you don't even know if there is one, how is it gatekeeping? Maybe it'd be easier to just petition for one to be added? Those bots seem fairly capable.

( but note to self, check if there is one later, barnes. )

Also I thought that's what a spa was but since I've never gone before I guess I don't really know. What would you expect from a real spa?

[smugreport]

The other ship had a spa.

[ It also had a (useless?) casino and a bowling ally but that's besides the point! ]

You know. Scented candles, relaxing music, hot towels, a masseuse or two. Basic things. Not a lot to ask things.

[counterstep]

Other ship? You were on another one before?

Candles are a fire hazard. Would a diffuser work? I'm sure the library has relaxing music. Hot towels we can do easily too. Not sure if we have any trained massage therapists, but how hard can that be.

Yeah, okay. I'll see what I can do.

( it's not like any of these are more weapons than the cutlery allowed in mess. )

[smugreport]

Yeah. A couple of us are transfers, I think the other guys were there longer than me. I barely got to enjoy the silver linings of this whole situation before they put me here instead.

[ Even worse, anyone else he knows of who came here from the Barge got a status upgrade. Everyone but him. An outrage. ]

That's not really the same, it's kinda a whole packaged experience.


But uh. Thanks?

private

[omniavincit]

[ Prooooooobably after the smackdown: ] I understand the impulse, but don't go overboard.

I was with him on the other ship. He wants his own personal bubble where he can pretend none of this is happening. [ And he can lord it over everyone else. But maybe that's not fair to say. ]

private

[counterstep]

didn't plan on it, but thanks for the warning
having anyone amenable is still better than overtly defiant
we don't really need more travises when we're all on this ship together


are you staying in the dorms? why?

private

[omniavincit]

I like defiant, to a point. I don't think any of them should be expected to be happy with this.

Are you complaining?

[counterstep]

not contesting that
still better without a bunch of travises

no just curious

[omniavincit]

Rhys may lap it up but some of them will see it for what it is. You talk to Travis?

I'm making him sleep there. It's only fair. [ A half-truth. He experiences the now-familiar swell of annoyance that comes with a lie, adds: ] I like inmates and I have some people I'm waiting on.

If Rhys moves to the cabin [ given the broken nose and all ] I might stay, keep an eye on Travis.

[ This is still approximately 75% of the truth, but you know. ]

[counterstep]

wholly aware of that
this isn't my first rodeo

waiting on? to arrive?

( the rest sounds like an excuse. william obviously doesn't want to be in wardens wing. bucky won't push though. thankfully he's unaffected by half truths right now anyway. )

[omniavincit]

You've been a prison guard before?

Yeah. [ He checks the loading bay at least once a day, as hopeless as it's started to feel. ] Friends who disappeared off the other ship.

[counterstep]

not directly but something like that

( psychopath babysitter might be more accurate in his case, considering zemo. )

so people really do disappear and never come back? like jinx?

[omniavincit]

You enjoy it? [ And the real question lurking behind it: how?

With a preemptive stab of guilt: ] Who's Jinx?