001; text; l.morningstar

[dealwiththe]

[ Probably after the sitch with Theo is resolved - late at night? Early in the morning? Who knows. Time is pretty meaningless to Lucifer. #relatable. ]

I think introductions are in order. My name is Lucifer Morningstar, and I'm a new warden here. For those that recognize my name, yes, I'm probably who you think I am, no, it's not a mistake, and no, I'm not here to kill, maim, torture or eat anyone's soul.

I don't think a soul would have much nutritional value.

Anyway, I'm glad to be here, and I'm used to getting lots of questions, so ask away.

warden filter

What would the over-under be on getting a piano in here do you suppose? Just curious. It's been ages since I've been able to play, and the minibar makes me nostalgic.

[ ooc: if you had a TDM thread with Lucifer, let me know if you'd like it to be game canon or not! I'm fine either way. ♥ ]

Comments

1/2

[saklas]

[unlike this tag, which was written on the spot, Volk had this written already! It boomerangs too fast for him to have not.]

So glad you asked.

1. The inmate dorms aren't just humiliating coffins where we can't change clothes privately, they aren't safe. If one of us wanted to kill someone else, nobody would get there in time, if they even noticed at all. I can cite two pieces of evidence for this. Every single warden cabin has a side-cabin intended for paired inmates. No one is paired, and that means the rooms are sitting unoccupied. Temporary inmates should be offered a choice to move into them, have their own shower, have a place for privacy and be able to sleep behind a locked door.

2. The Navarch won't speak to inmates. We can't argue our case. We arrive with a cookie-cutter message about how we'll be executed if we leave and that the universe is better without us in it. I'm done even trying to reason with her. Wardens can talk to her, though. I've seen you talk about it. Inmates should be given a list of what they're being charged with. Wardens could ask her on their behalf. After that, you have to make the call. If someone says they're innocent, is it better to let guilty ones go free, or to force genuinely blameless ones to be trapped forever because they can't make up for things they never actually did? I sure don't know! Great that this isn't my problem, because I didn't fucking sign up to work for her.

3. The infirmary should be open-access. Take out the scalpels and the sleeping pills if you want to, but we have chemical dependencies and serious psychiatric needs going unaddressed, and I can only guess it's because the other inmates don't want to go through a warden and take the chance that their medical needs will be exposed publicly and they still won't get them treated. Or maybe it's the fact that our only doctor is a surgeon. Kidnapping someone gives them some trust issues. Do you want medicated or unmedicated people in "therapy"? Expand that scenario for someone who suddenly has a heart attack or has their jaw broken by the loading bay door and you will end up with someone that dies in front of a locked infirmary, two feet away from help.

4. THE LOADING BAY DOOR NEEDS A FUCKING SENSOR. It will open and close without warning, I've put things in there, it crushes them. Someone will die. Not if, when.

5. Inmates need to be able to go outdoors and see THE 👏 ACTUAL 👏 SUN 👏, once a day, MINIMUM. I'm pretty sure we've known this as a medical fact for about two thousand years. Even if you assume the rations are giving us the vitamins we need - which I've seen absolutely no one promise - it's going to start making people crazy.